Baby Porn

Oy, this 2ww is crawling by! It feels like my IUI was months ago but I’m actually only 6dpiui. Sometimes, I'm 100% certain I'm pregnant. Other times, I'm completely convinced I'm going to get another BFN. Each day, I change my mind 20 times. It's like TTTC bipolar disorder or something!

So how have I been passing the time until I can finally POAS? By looking at baby porn! Please don't call the cops -- I'm not doing anything Chris Hanson from Dateline NBC would be interested in. I call looking at baby things looking at baby porn. It's kind of like how before I was even engaged, I already had a subscription to Martha Stewart Weddings and had most of the details of my wedding all planned out. That was my wedding porn and now I'm into baby porn. As embarrassing as it is to admit, I've been browsing nursery sites to get inspiration. I've already got a short list of cribs I like, know exactly which bedding I want for a boy and a girl and have several options for possible wall art bookmarked on my computer. It's kind of masochistic to subject myself to all of these baby-centric thoughts, but I just can't help it. In the past, I would avoid anything that could possibly "jinx" me getting pregnant (you know, like designing my yet to be conceived child's nursery!) but after so many BFN’s, I feel like I need something to keep me hopeful. And if that means picking out changing tables and car seats, then so be it!

For those of you who like to torture themselves in a similar manner, check out this new blog a friend of a friend of ours started called Project Nursery. I'm sure you'll enjoy it as much as I do!

www.projectnursery.com